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2005 Thoughts

1/2/05 - 11:19 pm It was a very long year but it did end fairly well. The long New Years weekend included lunch with two pregnant friends, one of which I have seen in a couple years, a great NYE party at a friend of a friend's house, and a fun New Year's night at Olde Towne watching a band. Saturday and Sunday mornings were a little rough but well worth the good times from the previous nights. There were a couple of bad moments but none worth mentioning. So tomorrow is the first work day of a very busy month and hopefully a very good year.

1/9/05 - 11:40 pm It was the first two day weekend in the past three weeks but it turned out to be the longest of the three. The work week itself was interesting but not busy. In the span of three days, two employees had given their two-week notices. One of them didn't have much of a choice we don't think. The other one is one of the last remaining techs to start the contact with me and was also involved in that unpleasantness with Asshat a while back. He is leaving for a better job on post so he isn't going all that far, but at least he is getting rid of his current employer which makes him happy. As soon as I heard about the first guy giving his notice I told one of my close friends about it. She had asked me a while ago about helping her boyfriend get a job up here and I'm sure he can do either of these jobs without a problem. I have some mixed feelings about it though. With both of them working on post I will probably get to see her less than I see her now. Plus, if their relationship goes south then things are bound to get awkward. But someone I care a lot about asked me for help and if this makes her happy then so be it. That takes me up to Thursday and that same friend ending up in the hospital with "walking pneumonia." The last time I spoke with her was on Friday and she was either getting out that day or on Saturday. Friday night didn't go quite as planned but it was probably better that it didn't. I still ended up at the bowling alley but not with anyone I was planning on seeing there. I was sick so I didn't have much of anything to drink but the person I spent a good portion of the night talking to certainly did. She is one of the regulars in the two places to drink on post and spent most of the night lamenting about her most recent ex-boyfriend. She's a law student and he's a recovering drug and alcohol abuser. Anyway, I was fairly distracted through most of our conversation by thoughts of my friend in the hospital. So Saturday rolls around and I get to chat with another friend that I care a lot about. Every time I chat with her she sounds so unhappy. I wish she would move back home but she thinks she needs to stay with her boyfriend because she owes him too much money. That's two friends I have now that are with their boyfriends because one owes the other money... not a reason to stay with someone really. Besides thinking so much about these two friends all weekend, I've had a constant headache since Friday night which I can't seem to get rid of. Thankfully, the weekend is now over and I can get back to work tomorrow. Next weekend is going to be a good weekend I think... should make up for this one :)

1/11/05 - 12:15 am It was a very interesting Monday. Within the first hour of work today, we lost our third project manager in two and a half years. The only reason I was given was that she left for "personal reasons" but there is obviously more to it than that. I did not see this coming but apparently others did. The rest of the day was fairly uneventful but tonight was pretty good. I went to the bowling alley as usual but one of my close friends actually showed up tonight... twice. Its probably best that I don't say anymore about that though... best to be happy with the fact that she was there.

1/18/05 - 1:03 am A pretty good weekend all things considered. Friday night didn't start out quite the way I was hoping it would but it was still a good night. I ended up watching a soccer game around 11pm... my once-usual Friday night soccer game that I used to love going to. I'm going to try to get back to going but it won't always be easy to do. Saturday was basically spent waiting for Saturday night. A bunch of people ended up meeting up at a new sports bar in Boonsboro to see my favorite local band. The place was huge but so new that they haven't got all of the bugs worked out yet. The place used to be an old livestock auction house so the band actually played in a fairly large auditorium-like room. The only problem was that it was clearly not designed with sound quality in mind. Still, it was a nice place and I think everyone had a good time. I even saw someone I graduated high school with... the guy that is right beside me in the yearbook as a matter of fact. Turns out he's a teacher at Walkersville so we spent some time seeing who was still there from when we were in high school. The night only had a couple of down moments, thoughts about wanting to spend more time with some of the gang that night. Some serious thoughts, some fleeting... thankfully the music was loud enough to keep me from thinking about them for too long. I did get a call from an old friend from WVU while I was there... seems she'll be coming into town next weekend. I wanted to call her back this weekend but things have been a little busy. Next weekend was supposed to be my free weekend but it looks like I'll have at least two things on my plate... both of which I am really looking forward to. Anyway, time for me to hit the sack so I can get the work week started and over with as soon as possible.

1/23/05 - 11:39 pm Okay, before I start complaining let me just say that it was a good weekend despite the things that pissed me off. Friday was horribly dull until about midnight when I went to the soccer game. The more I go the more I want to play again... not just for the exercise but because there are so many whiny babies on the other teams that need taught a lesson. With the exception of this week, the refs really aren't that good. Most blow far too many calls and worse yet, back down when confronted by players and never throw cards. This week it was a new ref and he had the game well under control, which was a problem for the other team... which is also why one of their players for ejected. On to Saturday and the snowstorm. I understand not plowing the roads immediately when they are calling for several more inches of snow but there is no excuse to not plow for over 8 hours after the storm has stopped. If you aren't going to plow, then tell people not to go out. That brings me to the people that do go out. Just because the roads aren't in perfect condition doesn't mean the left lane has turned into the slow lane. Good rule to follow... if you have your hazard lights on, you should never be in the left lane on a major highway. Today the roads were in much better shape and the only thing I had to contend with were those people that clear just enough snow off their cars to see and not a flake more. Nothing like getting stuck behind some jackass that still has 6 inches of snow on the top of his car to make it seem like you're driving in a snowstorm. Last complaint from this weekend... the parking situation in my court has gotten ridiculous. Right now there are two cars that have been parked in the same spaces for weeks because they don't work. The owner happens to own the house next door and freely admits they don't work. Then we have the people that think its okay to park in the middle of the court and block traffic. Okay, I'm done with the complaining. Even with all that crap, it was still a pretty good weekend for reasons I can't go into. The only truly sad part was that Johnny Carson died. I was never a big fan of The Tonight Show but he was definitely a legend and helped a lot of great people get started in show business.

2/7/05 - 12:00 am Sorry for the lack of posts folks but I was away this past week at an annual conference and just got back Friday evening. It was a long work week that started last Saturday at 5am and didn't end until Wednesday night. Over the past two weeks, I put in 100+ hours of work but loved every second of it. This year was a bit different from the last two since it was in Florida but I think it was the best year so far. We didn't have a single problem that was within our control to fix and we saw some very good speakers. I was very glad the week went so well and was so busy because I needed it to take my mind off of my fairly disastrous week prior. I went out on a date the weekend before I left and thought that everything went well... at least that's what I assume when a second date is mentioned before the first one ends. We chatted that night and the next day then poof... not a word from her since then. Getting quite tired of this really. On to other topics... I found out today that a friend of mine and her husband are heading into some rough times over the next few months. Their marriage is fine and the baby is fine but other things happened that they would much rather of not happened... but isn't that always the case. Personally, I think they will get through it fine... they both have far too good of heads not to. Okay, off to bed and back to work tomorrow... can't wait :)

2/9/05 - 1:00 am Tonight was closure. It took over a year, but I am finally healed in regards to someone that I care deeply for. There are still issues... but none that she controls and certainly none that will stop me from smiling and being happy the next time I see her.

2/16/05 - 11:19 pm Work has been fairly slow lately but my second job has certainly made up for it. I've spent pretty much all of my free time over the last 6 days working on other people's computers, which has been a blessing in disguise actually... kept me from thinking about V-day and such. I didn't hear any good V-day stories this year though... no one I know got engaged or married... no one seemed to do anything special. As a matter of fact, most couples seems to be either stuck in a rut, low on funds, or both. None of the people I have talked to have complained about it though so everything must still be okay. I only have a couple days left this week then its another week-long trip away from work... down to San Antonio TX this time. This will be my first business trip where I'm not actually working. I'm heading down there to get some training on one of the programs I use every day... which may mean more responsibility when I get back. Doesn't really matter... I was happy that I was picked to go. Other stuff... I've planned a trip over to Mo'town in March and am hoping to meet up with a few people while I'm there. Speaking of people, I have a couple that I'm worried about right now. I can't really do anything to help either of them right now. One I don't know well enough to force her to tell me what's wrong, and the other I can't risk upsetting and pushing her away. I guess we'll just have to wait and see how things turn out.

2/23/05 - 10:31 pm My week is half over and so far its been a pretty good one. I'm still down in San Antonio for another two days but the training is going a lot better than I expected it to. I've managed a little bit of free time and gotten to see a couple sites. I've seen The Alamo but haven't been in it yet and I got to visit The River Walk that everyone told me to see. The down side of the week has been the abundance of Internet and game-free time I've had. Without them to distract me my mind has wandered to other things and other people a lot more than I want it to. Just a couple more days of training then its back to normal for a couple weeks... then its my St Patrick's Day vacation week :)

2/28/05 - 12:08 am You'd think that after a week that included 8 hours of flying, lost luggage, delayed flights, and 30 hours of training that I would be ready for a relaxing weekend at home. Well, I was but it was anything but relaxing. Things started down hill when mother started questioning me about my week the second I came upstairs. I don't mind answering questions but not before I have even put my suitcase down, and not at midnight, and not when the person asking them is in bed, and not from two rooms away. Since I didn't drop everything immediately and give a complete and full account of my week she was "hurt" which is how things started on Saturday. My weekend only got worse from then so there isn't any point going into it. It is supposed to snow tonight but I am hoping that it won't because I don't want a day off tomorrow, I need to go to work and get out of my foul mood.

3/6/05 - 11:55 am It was a very busy week at work for everyone last week. We did end up having a day off on Monday which only added to the crap from last weekend. Some people did go into work though since the post didn't officially close for the day until 8am and some people start before then. I wish I would have gone in though, would have been a lot better for me. Anyway, we got a new project manager this week. He is an outsider but he seems like a nice guy... hopefully he'll be around for a while. He joined us at the beginning of the week... unfortunately, by the end of the week he had already been a part of a forced resignation/firing. One of our helpdesk technicians was asked to resign on Friday... either that or be fired immediately. I don't think anyone saw it coming... he missed work on Tuesday because he was snowed in (so was another employee), he was there on Wednesday and Thursday, then he was there for a short bit on Friday before he was forced to resign. I have no idea what happened since I've never heard anything but good things about him from the clients. Maybe we'll hear something else this week. Anyway, its a full week of work (I hope) then I'm off next week for a mandatory vacation. I'm already looking forward to next weekend and heading down to Gaithersburg to see BBFM. Anyway, off to bed.

3/16/05 - 12:16 am Its been a while since I did an update. Not too much to report really. Went to see BBFM this past weekend at a new place in Gaithersburg and had a great time. I had planned everything out so I wouldn't drink too much, get home in time to get 8 hours of sleep, and not be hung over for my racquetball game Sunday morning. Things were going according to plan until someone decided to call me at 6:20am and ruin what was a good night's sleep. The caller said "I thought I'd get your voicemail" before proceeding to tell me what was wrong with his computer. Needless to say, I wasn't too happy and was made even more unhappy when he wasn't around when I told him I was going to call later that day. Anyway, I'm off work this week and have had a pretty good "vacation" so far. Went to the bowling alley last night and had a pretty good time as usual. Heard some interesting stories, got a little worried about some people, generally enjoyed myself. So now its off to Mo'town to celebrate St. Patrick's Day :)

3/24/05 - 12:23 am Things have been very busy and I'm pretty tired but I had to do some kind of update. The short version of the past week or so is that I had a great time in Mo'town, had a good weekend, and have been insanely busy with work since then. More later...

3/31/05 - 11:18 pm Its been a long time since I had a bad day at work so I guess I was about due. A couple days ago I was told by my supervisor that there is a "perception" that I spend too much time back at the Helpdesk. Since then I feel like I've been walking on eggshells no matter what I do at work. I haven't got a clue how I am supposed to react to a "perception" since I don't know who brought it to my boss' attention in the first place. If it was a government person then it should have been addressed in a different way since it could affect the contract. If it was another supervisor then they should have clarified it a little more. If it was someone on the same level as me then it should have never been brought to me in the first place. I do visit the Helpdesk more than all of the other techs combined, but then that's what I was told to do. I am the one assigned to answer their questions, been that way for two project managers now. I could go on but I won't. I've had some pretty good nights over the last couple weeks thanks to a couple great nights at the bowling alley and a few extra days off from the parents. Tomorrow is Friday and I am planning on going out tomorrow evening to Champions. I was hoping to get some of the co-workers together but none wanted to come out so it will be a small group consisting of the most important people :)

4/10/05 - 11:29 pm Last week was absolutely insane at work and while this week shouldn't be as bad, it isn't going to be a slow one. That comment from a couple weeks ago is still effecting my work and I've started to take a lot of things very personally when I really shouldn't. Oh well. The Friday night out from a couple weeks ago didn't turn out quite as planned since it ended up only being me and two other guys. We had a good time but it was disappointing to have so many people decline or bail on us. This weekend wasn't too bad I guess... at least Saturday night was good. I went to see BBFM at this place in Boonsboro and didn't get to bed until 4am. I had a good time, talked with friends, went partially deaf and blind, and met my friend's little brother... although he didn't spend much time with us since he had higher priorities than listening to music ;) Not too much else to report on at the moment, at least nothing I feel like sharing.

4/17/05 - 11:55 pm It was an interesting and annoying weekend. First off, Adelphia has been pissing me off to no end lately. I lose my connection for at least an hour once a day on average. I've tried to find a pattern to it but it just isn't anything that has to do with my house. I've called Adelphia tech support and tried to explain to them that it isn't just me, that whenever I lose a connection, so do other Adelphia customers in the area. I know this because other customers don't know how to secure their wireless networks and our wireless system jumps to their network when it loses a connection here. Anyway, for the second Wednesday in a row, they are sending a technician out to look into things... the last time he was here he managed to knock out 2/3 of our channels in the course of "fixing" my problem. Besides Adelphia, my webpage decided to not work for a couple days last week... but I shouldn't complain too much about that... I pay $10 a year for that service. Okay... geek stuff is done. A couple weeks ago I had dinner with someone I met online. She is very nice, very smart, ambitious, educated, has a strong personality, and has a good sense of humor. I saw a pic of her before we met so I had a reasonable idea as to what I was in for. Well, I'm at the restaurant waiting for her and she ends up being about a half hour late... would have been longer if I hadn't of called her to say I was there already (she was still at work... two hours after her scheduled work day). She arrives and I know from the start that it will have to convince myself to go out with her. We part ways and things kinda died down after that. On Friday we are chatting online and she decides to buy a 20 game season ticket package for the Washington Nationals and asks me to go to the next game... on Saturday. I don't have anything going on Saturday so I figure "what the hell." We make plans to meet at a Metro stop halfway between us at 6pm which would give us plenty of time to make the game. Saturday rolls around, I get my computer calls done in time and make it to the Metro stop at 5:40pm. I call her cell and leave a message (my first indication that something was up) saying that I was here. Six o'clock passes and I call again... this time it doesn't even ring and goes straight to voicemail (my second indication). She calls at 6:15pm and says "I'm running a little behind." She had just left her house... which was 20 minutes from her first Metro station and over an hour away from me!!!!! She had done some work at home, took a nap, and overslept. For those of you that don't know this about me... while I hate to be late, I hate it even more when other people make me late or are late meeting me. This is basically strike two for her. If it weren't for the fact that she was going to the game no matter what, I would have gone home. I didn't want her walking in DC by herself at night so I decided to wait for her and go to the game. The game was good, her seats are nice, the stadium and concessions suck, but all was good up until she grabbed my hand. Now we have a problem kids... a problem where I need a little honest advice. Like I said above, I knew from the first time I saw her I'd have to convince myself to go out with her. The reason for that is because she is a "boobiedo"... I think my regular visitors to this page know what that is. I feel like a complete and total ass for being judgmental like that, especially after so many years of being judged myself, but it just isn't something I can easily get past. It isn't even a close boobiedo... its kinda like me when I weighed 250lbs. What I'm afraid of is if I go out with her, I'll let myself go again and get right back up there to 250lbs... and that is a very real concern since she is very nearly a professional chef and I know I'll love her cooking. With the relative bad luck I've been having with the online dating thing (you should see some of the women that "wink" at me on Match.com) combined with my age and dating history, I don't know if I can afford to pass up someone that I am even slightly interested in. She's a great woman but neither of us have the time to enter into a relationship that will be half-assed. I did get to talk to one friend about this tonight and while she's at the other end of the relationship-challenged spectrum (can have anyone she wants but keeps getting "losers") she doesn't think I should pursue it. There are more details of course but I'm too tired to write them down. Y'all know my email address and/or cell phone number... let me know your thoughts.

4/28/05 - 9:27 pm Well, I've gotten some pretty good feedback from my last post. Its nice to know that all of my friends think the same way, at least about this topic. She and I did go to a Nats game on Monday but things were definitely weird, mostly because I didn't give her any opportunity to hold my hand. She was on time this time though. I did feel bad about how the night ended... I told her I would be leaving by the 7th inning or 9:15pm at the latest and I thought she'd leave then too, but she wanted to see the rest of the game so she stayed. I felt like an ass but I was dead tired as it was and needed to get home. It was good that I left when I did anyway because I had a horrible migraine by the time I got home. We haven't talked since then but I'm sure we will at some point. Anyway, life moves on and while I'm not totally convinced that I'll ever find someone, everyone else seems to think I will :) I do apologize for the lack of updates... my hosting provider was down for a few days so I had to go get a new one. If you're reading this then everything at HostPC is working correctly :) April is almost over and May is looking like it is going to be a very big month... a couple birthdays, hopefully a birth, a party or two, and another Nats game. Thanks again for all the advice, feel free to contribute anytime :)

5/9/05 - 11:19 am The last two weekends have been pretty interesting and pretty good... at least for me. I saw "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" last Saturday and thought that it was fairly well done, at least as well done as a movie version of a Douglas Adams book can be. It certainly won't win any major awards but it definitely had the "Douglas Adams" feel to it. After the movie I went to a party at a friend of a friend's house. I always enjoy myself when I go there, mostly because I can enjoy talking to just about anyone there... whether its the guys, who are all computer geeks, or their wives/girlfriends, who seem to be mostly nurses and/or teachers. Anyway, I finally got to meet someone that was mentioned to me way back on New Years. I didn't know anything about her except that she is nice and is a nurse. As it turns out, she this gorgeous woman from Morocco who happens to be a belly dancer (not sure why someone thought that I should know that). I really didn't get a chance to talk to her one on one but I don't think I'm her type. So, I left around 12:30am and went home to no Internet connection (a common thing nowadays). At 2:30am I get a call from a sobbing friend needing a ride away from the party. I won't go into too many details except to say that I didn't make it home until almost 4am and the root cause of the sobbing was pretty stupid. Her and her husband worked things out in about 30 seconds (that's how stupid the root cause was) and all was right with the world by Sunday. So the work week flies by and Friday happens. My boss took the techs out for a few beers a Bushwaller's downtown and we had a surprisingly good time. On Saturday I volunteer to be the driver for my two friends since its his birthday and they got a hotel room for the evening so they could drink without having to drive back to Hagerstown. We shoot pool for a few hours before hitting Old Towne to see BBFM play. It was kind of a sad night for all of us since one of the band members was playing for the last time, at least as a regular member.

5/10/05 - 4:35pm Okay... my network connection has been up and down so often lately that I didn't even get a chance to finish or upload the post from yesterday. Adelphia sent two more techs out yesterday and they determined that I need a line technician to replace out cable line. Funny thing... that's what the tech from April 20th said and that's who I thought was coming out yesterday. Personally, I don't think that is going to solve the problems either since when I lose my connection, so does another Adelphia customer near me. If we both lose our connections at the same time, how is replacing my line going to fix it? Anyway, everything else is going pretty well all things considered. I'm heading over to Mo'town in a couple weeks and I'm really looking forward to it, more so than usual for some reason.

5/19/05 - 2:29 am Fair warning kids... this isn't going to be the most coherent post. So I'm out tonight, out with a friend/ex... enjoying a few good games of Photohunt and having a good discussion or two about socio-political topics when a great many things comes flooding into my head. Maybe its the time of year, or the company I was with, or the current events of my life... but all of the names and dates and events came storming back to me. Fond memories of ALM, CES, SMC, JLS, BLV, CMP and JEN... how things ended with each of them, how I would have given anything to keep most of them going. Most well-rounded people will tell you to let go of your past, forget those that left you, push down the memories of the ones that hurt you. That isn't me though, Like I told someone I met tonight... I'm on speaking terms with all of my ex's... actual friends with some, and I take great pride in that. Sometimes it would be easier if I weren't... its far easier to be mad at someone than be their friend, but that just isn't me. I've had the same nightmare at least once a week for the past 12 years (except for an all too brief two month period) but yet I would still give anything for the one that brought on that nightmare in the first place. Yeah, that probably sounds stupid to most of you, but then most of you have already found your perfect partner. As for me, I've found her too... a few times actually... I've just never been able to hold on to her long enough to prove it to her. Time to go...

6/2/05 - 1:58 am Sorry about that kids, I've been a bit too lax in my updates lately. Since my last post one of my best friends became a mom... but most of you already know that. Its kind of been an exciting couple of weeks since my last update. The weekend of the 21st I was over in Mo'town celebrating a friend's graduation and enjoying a cookout with friends. This past weekend I went to a surprise 25th anniversary party for a friend/co-worker/would-like-to-be-adopted-mom and had an absolute blast. Its been a very long time since I've been that drunk but it was all worth it since I met lots of new people. There were a number of moments of sadness though both that night and since then... moments when I realized that I missed out on my chance of being part of that family. Anyway, that party was Friday... and Sunday was a Memorial Day party at another friend's house. On the relationship front, I don't really know what to say... there is someone new but there are issues already. Okay, not issues... just one issue... living at home. I've met her, we get along great, we have very compatibly personalities and similar goals... she just can't imagine herself being serious with someone that doesn't have his own house. Do I really have to give up a job that I love just to take a crappy yet higher paying job to make barely enough money to afford a place that I don't really want all to demonstrate that I'm not really a 30 year old loser that lives with his parents?!?! I am so damn tired of this game but I've got too much left to give to quit... stupid fucking Wells.

6/12/05 - 11:26 pm Over the past couple weeks I've been trying to replace this "thoughts" section with a real blog so I can add updates more often and from anyplace but its been very slow going. Of all the things holding me up, I can't seem to change the background color from white to gray so it matches the rest of the site. The past couple of weeks have been pretty busy for me at work. I think it was revolving around the change of command that we had on Friday... but I won't know for sure until this week is over with. So now we have a new Colonel in charge of the Garrison and of all the people to pick, they picked the Colonel I like the most. As far as the relationship thing goes, I've seen the woman I mentioned in my last post two more times since then and we had fun both times. The housing issue hasn't been brought up again so I don't think its a complete deal breaker at the moment. I enjoy my time with her but I do wish we could spend more time together. The only real "bad news" to report is that school is officially out for the year which means mother is home every day. Oh well, time for bed.

6/19/05 - 11:35 pm It was another busy week at work. The theory from my last update certainly didn't hold true as to why we had been so busy since I may have been busier this week than the previous ones. Life outside of work had its moments this week though. We went out Thursday night to celebrate an early Father's Day at one of our favorite local places. Things got a little awkward when someone I was seeing last October showed up for dinner with one of her friends. It wouldn't have been so bad if mother didn't want to set me up with this woman at the beginning of the school year and still doesn't know that we did date briefly. Of course now that this woman is married and pregnant, mother had to add a few jabs about me "missing out" on her. Dinner ended quickly enough and the woman and I ended up chatting online about it later that night. Anyway, Friday night was pretty good since I got to go to my weekly soccer game for the first time in about a month. I've pretty much committed myself to playing next session so I'm hoping my injured ankle is 100% by then. Saturday was a very good day. I went down to Fairfax again to see my friend and had a good time as usual. I made the mistake of sitting out by the pool for about 3 and a half hours though without sunblock... needless to say I'm still a bit crispy. Turns out that the no sunblock thing was just one of my errors in judgement that day... the other probably damaged a friendship far more than it could have ever helped. Today was spent fixing computers and avoiding stepping foot outside for fear that the big bright thing in the sky would burn me more. Ya know, the sunburn doesn't bother me nearly as much as the fact that its a really uneven burn... but at least I don't have any tan lines on my face this time. Oh, almost forgot... the parents are out of town until at least Thursday so my week should be pretty good :)

6/26/05 - 11:21 pm It was a pretty good week for the most part. A few days without the parents did me a lot of good but it went way too fast. It did help the week speed up though which got me through what has turned into an endless battle with a doomed project. This weekend wasn't too much fun though. I had gotten used to seeing a certain someone over the past few weekends and I missed out on my chance to see her this weekend. I have no idea when the next time I'll get to see her will be since she is going to be vacationing a lot this summer then working every weekend starting in mid-August. I'm sure we'll find some time but I don't know when. I did get a call from an old college friend last night. It's been about 4 or 5 months since I last talked to her I think. The last two times she's called saying she was in Frederick I ended up being either in Florida or Texas. She sounded pretty good as usual and hopefully I'll get to see her sometime in July when she is over this way again. I have a busy week again this week but have a day and a half off in the middle of it to take in a Nats game with a friend which I am really looking forward to. I think the week is going to go quickly again, which is good since I'm already missing chatting with a certain friend ;)

7/5/05 - 12:29 am Holy crap was this ever a long weekend! Last week did go as quickly as I had hoped but I haven't gotten to really chat with that certain someone since she got back. I got a message from her Friday night telling me she made it home but that she would be spending this weekend with her family. I thought we had made plans for Sunday but I understand her needing to spend time with the family, especially her aunt that she's taking a big trip with soon. We talked briefly on the phone Saturday but it was a weird conversation... I told her that I missed her and she didn't really believe me. I can't really describe how that made me feel. I had just finished up helping my boss and his wife (whom I graduated with) move out of their house when I found out she called. They have two kids and a third on the way and I have a hard time dealing with that... the whole married-parent former-classmate thing. I was excited to see that my friend had called so I called her back as soon as I could. I guess I was expecting her to be more excited to talk to me, at least that's what I got from her message Friday night. Maybe I mistook her not believing and she was really just being playful... I simply wasn't in the playful mood at that moment. Anyway, since my plans were cancelled on Sunday and I managed to escape the family 4th of July party that the parents went to, I spent most of the day working and cleaning my room. Today I finally managed to go up and see one of my best friend's 6 week old daughter for the first time. She was as adorable as I was expecting her to be :) Hrm... what other stuff... oh, I did go to a Nats game last Tuesday with a good friend from school. The evening didn't quite turn out as I had hoped. We got very lost trying to get to the stadium from Baltimore (DC is a screwed up city to try to navigate in) and ended up a bit late. The game was one of the fastest they had played all year and we were on our way back by 9:30pm. I was hoping to stay up late and drink with her then crash there but she hasn't been feeling well lately (which has me a bit worried) so I decided to head home. Still, it was a good night... it always is when its just me and her hanging out. I also heard from another friend this week, one whom I haven't talked to since March. She finally got rid of her fiancee and is back home in WV. She is already dating again which worries me a bit. I understand the desire to be with someone but I'd like to see her single for a while. Anyway, its a short week this week but I'm sure it will be busy.

7/18/05 - 10:26 pm Things have been pretty eventful over the past couple weeks, although not totally good I hate to say. Work has been nothing but nuts for weeks now... even if its a slow day for everyone else I still have had a lot to do every day. One big event happened last week and now that we're past that, I can concentrate on the never ending project again, much to the joy of one person who's ass is on the line to get the project done successfully. Outside of work has been okay at best. My certain someone is away on a cruise for another week but things kind of took a turn for the worse before she left so who knows where things will stand when she gets back. She told me that I should go ahead and post my ad again on Match since neither of us know when we'll see each other again and its "only fair" she she never took her's down in the first place. The ad is back up but I just don't feel like looking at the moment... too many other things on my mind. My friend that moved back home to WV recently is doing okay. I saw her this weekend for about an hour and I'm hoping to see her again soon. I spoke to another good friend this weekend and her never ending streak of bad luck seem to be continuing. Since we went to the Nats game together, she's been in a car accident and her father has had a heart attack. Her car is still being fixed, she doesn't seem any worse for wear physically, and her dad is out of the hospital after having some stints put in. I invited her up this weekend to see my favorite local band play... I figure she needs at least one stress free night of drinking and fun. Hopefully I'll have a group to hang out with this Saturday besides just her... Olde Town is always more fun with a group. I played my first game of soccer in 13 years on Friday and got my ass handed to me. I couldn't last more than 5 minutes at a time before practically collapsing, and I pulled something in my leg that still hasn't healed. I did score a goal though, my first goal ever in a real game. That's it for now.

7/24/05 - 10:46 pm Yet another busy week last week. That certain someone returns home from her trip tomorrow and I have to admit that I missed her quite a bit. I'm not going to email or call her though, something tells me she'll be pretty tired and I'm sure she'll have enough to catch up on at home without me calling her first thing. This weekend was pretty good although a little painful. I pulled a groin muscle playing racquetball on Friday and then played soccer Friday night which didn't help things. The team did a bit better but we didn't have our normal goalie so it was still sort of a blow out. I did a lot better though, scored both our goals and felt a lot better while I was in... certainly played longer than 5 minutes at a time this week. Saturday was the painful day... the body did not appreciate what I did to it the day before. I did go out Saturday night but my one friend didn't make it up. I called her a couple times and haven't heard back so I'm hoping that everything is okay. The band was awesome as usual and we had a pretty good group there. Even one of my co-workers and his wife were there, on her birthday nonetheless. Oddly enough, one of their first dates was at Olde Town so I guess it was kind of fitting that they came. Today was a fairly slow day, spent a lot of it working on one computer which still isn't done. I'm hoping this week goes by quickly since the parents leave for the beach this coming weekend and I get a semi-vacation (from them).

7/31/05 - 11:40 pm What was such a good week really ended pretty badly. The whole week was building up to a test run for that never ending project I've been working on. The test finally happened on Thursday and it was a 100% success. While I proved that it does work, there is just way too much to watch over on a daily basis for it to work in the "real world." I did get to go out with a friend Thursday night, first time in quite a while actually. We ended up closing down Champions as usual. Friday was looking to be a good day until I got a phone call from mother. I won't go into details but it caused me to miss my soccer game Friday night and now my should-be-quiet week will have daily phone calls from mother and other family members. The weekend could have been good though but I never got to talk to or see either of the people that would have made all better. I'm hoping the rest of the week goes better.

8/9/05 - 1:07 am I was an eventful but slightly lonely week last week but I'm too tired to write about it at the moment. More later.

8/22/05 - 12:31 am Holy crap... has it really been that long since I updated this thing!?!?! Okay, let start with the day of my last update... the night of the 9th I went out with an old friend from college and two of her college friends. We were out fairly late, late for a Tuesday night anyway, but I had fun as I do every time I'm out with her. It was a fairly enjoyable experience being out with three women... even if two of them were married. My friend made the drunken suggestion that if neither of us if involved in 5 years that we should have a child together, to which I responded "are you kidding?" We discussed it for a few and when one of the others mentioned us living together because of the child we both replied something akin to "oh hell no." Work that week revolved around the never ending project and its relative conclusion for me that Friday. We had our final test and proved that it worked to the people that mattered. I still have some cleanup to do and some documentation to write but for the most part I'm done. I wish I could have celebrated the "victory" a little more but I had a soccer game that night. We tied 4-4 (which is our best game so far) and I had one goal. We all know the summer session is a little rough since everyone goes on vacation but we really need some more reliable people. I think I played all but 5 minutes of the game so my ass was dragging for most of it. Still, we played well and I'm excited to get back to it this Friday. That weekend was pretty good too. I had a date on Sunday and it went very well (more on that in a minute). The following work week was far busier than I was expecting. It seemed like we had a lot of stupid "please move this" or "we're turning this in" or "we need..." tickets and few real problems. Unfortunately, those kind of tickets usually take the longest. It was my week to assign tickets and one of my co-workers got a little snippy with me for assigning him the tickets I did. He is our resident "morale crusher" (and that isn't just my opinion) so I didn't take what he said to heart. After looking at that day's tickets he did have a reason to gripe, although I wouldn't have known that at the time. That week was also three friends' b-days, two on the 16th and one on the 19th. I found out on on Wednesday one of my best friend's father had quadruple bypass surgery early last week. He's recovering and was "lucky" because they caught it before there was any damage to his heart. Her husband was one of the friends having a b-day... his present was his father-in-law coming through so well :) The other friend having a b-day was someone I was seeing in recent months. I wished her a happy b-day and she emailed me back and told me that she's back with her ex. Not much of a surprise... I knew things were over before she went on her trip (hence the date I went on). The "ex" thing did surprise me though, which she apologized for given my "track record" of women ditching me for their ex's. Still... if things work out for them then my lucky streak (for them) is intact ;) That brings us up to this weekend. I had another date with the woman from last weekend, we went to a BBFM show on Friday night at Olde Towne. We left after the second set and had a good Friday night and Saturday morning ;) The rest of my Saturday was spent working on computers and napping. Today was spent working on computers and making beef jerky. Okay... I know I was going to get on my soapbox about a few things right now but I can't remember what the hell they were. Guess I'll have to try to remember them and save them for next time.

9/6/05 - 12:04 am Lots of stuff happening over the past couple weeks. Work was mighty busy again thanks to a lot of stupid tickets being put in all at once. Most of them had to do with people not knowing how to do their job properly... which may be due to a lack of real training, or a simple refusal to think outside of the box. Whatever the reason, we have to clean things up. I found out late last week that two of our techs that are at another organization will not be rejoining us after all. The organization they are at decided to do away with contractors and we've been waiting for them to come back and rejoin us. As it turns out, they were hired to fill the two government jobs that were created when the organization decided to get rid of the contractors. I don't really know what this means for us... don't know if there are two positions available now or not. I hope there are because there are two people at the helpdesk I'd like to see move up. I do know that morale at the helpdesk is sinking fast and if one or both of the two people that deserve to move up get passed over we may lose them. Anyway, things outside of work have been okay. Spent this weekend with my new certain someone and had a good time. Not entirely sure where things are going to go though... have to enlist the advice of my friends I think. Speaking of friends, I'm looking forward to going to WVU this coming weekend for the home opener and to see some friends. Time for bed.

9/15/05 - 9:50 pm Let's see... this past weekend was a pretty good one. WVU won its first home game (not much of a surprise really) and I had a great time hanging out with some of the old gang. Sunday was a little rough though... really could have used another couple hours of sleep before heading back home. As for work, last week and this week have been a bit trying so far. My boss was out of work for a few days and prior to him leaving he split up most of his duties so that no one really needed to be in charge of us. Management knew this apparently but either couldn't deal with it or didn't like it so I got asked to "fill in." It would have been best if we had just been left alone to manage ourselves for those few days since nothing bad happened that really required a leader. The one thing that did take some kind of decision should have been handled by management but got passed to me instead which I promptly fucked up. Thankfully, the boss is back and I've been assigned to cover for one of the techs that will be a government employee at the end of the month. He decided to take a three week vacation on practically no notice (at least no notice to us). Its kind of funny since his company only gives about 13 to 15 days off a year, and he's been off a few days here and there already, AND he's taken another three week vacation within the past 12 months... makes you wonder. This is my least favorite organization to cover for but it isn't going too bad this time, probably because I'm spending all of my time setting up systems instead of talking to the customers. Anyway, life outside of work is stressful at the moment. I am still unsure about my new certain someone. I don't know what it is exactly but the "teacher personality" as I call it is a big factor I think. I'm going to visit her again this weekend and she wants to go out and sightsee but that just isn't going to happen. I was away last weekend and will be away the next two weekends (after this one) so I barely feel like driving to see her let alone go out anywhere. I shouldn't complain though, she does make me happy. Okay, off to bed.

9/26/05 - 12:15 am This weekend definitely did not go off like originally planned but it was still a good weekend. WVU won its 4th game but not by a landslide like I always hope for. The best football news wasn't that win though, it was Louisville getting crushed by an unranked school which it great since they were picked to win the Big East this year. It wasn't a conference loss but it was a loss nonetheless. Anyway, I got to see my certain someone again this weekend and we went out to see my favorite band again on Saturday. A couple good friends met her for the first time and seem to like her, unfortunately that doesn't help my confusion at all. I'm just worried about not being able to spend enough time with her. Anyway, another friend of mine is back at home after visiting her ex, and hopefully to stay this time. I worry about her quite a bit but she seems to be getting stronger when it comes to dealing with men. As for work, it looks like we might be losing an employee soon, or at least that's what my gut is telling me. Don't know if they will quit or be fired but I don't see them sticking around much longer. Oh, and the neverending project that ended about a month ago looks like it is un-ending itself. It seems that the "final test" we did wasn't good enough for someone so now we have to go through it all again. Thankfully, my part isn't any more difficult, but it will be more difficult to get a passing grade this time. Anyway, this week should go fast which will lead into next weekend's trip to Mo'town and the VT game.

9/28/05 - 2:32 am That's right.... two updates in as many days!!! Work shit first... we got through another "final test" of the neverending project today and we might be done with it again... maybe. Because of the project, I'm really far behind on my regular work, which I hope to catch up on today (Wednesday). You might be wondering why I'm updating this at 2:30am... its because I just got home from closing down Champions with a friend. It was a great night, one I have been waiting for all summer. I have missed hanging out with this friend and tonight made up for a lot of things. We had a great heart to heart talk about our respective past and I think feel better about some things, or at least I do. We talked about about my current situation and it helped me realize even more that I need to get out of it before I get into it even deeper, especially if I want to keep from hurting anyone, including myself. Okay, enough rambling for now... bed time.

10/23/05 - 10:40 pm Okay, its been a while, I know... sorry. Work first. We have at least one job opening now, possibly two. We got one back when two techs went government at the beginning of the month and we got the other one when one of the helpdesk techs decided not to come to work anymore and blow of pretty much everything. I knew he didn't like his job and really wanted to move up but I didn't think he'd just walk away. Funny thing is that if he would have held on until now he may have gotten what he wanted. Not too much else going on at work really, although my yearly review is coming up so we'll see how that goes. On the personal side of things... my most recent certain someone is a thing of the past. After a long of a talk a couple weeks ago and another talk last week she has "decided" that I can't give her the time she needs right now. I decided that several weeks ago but she wanted to see if she could handle it. The time thing was only one reason though, the rest of them not being suitable for here. As for things here at home, they've been fairly good with the exception of today. No fights or anything, just some usual stuff from mother that I was expecting. Okay, off to bed... I have a feeling its going to be a busy week this week.

11/14/05 - 10:40 pm I really didn't think it had been quite this long, I swear... kinda shows how busy things have been lately. Let's see, since my last update I've been to another WVU game and had another good time. This time it was me, my dad, my uncle, and another friend going to the game. Game day was good and I'm pretty sure that everyone had a good time. I also got to spend some time with a couple friends but no time with another couple friends :( That game was on a Wednesday so I actually had a long weekend that week, even spent an extra day in Mo'town... but that was to avoid coming home for the most part. My cousin and her infant son came down for the weekend and I really didn't feel like dealing with that. I was also supposed to go out with someone that weekend but that didn't happen. I didn't hear back from her the last time I emailed her but it wasn't a date or anything so it wasn't much of a problem... although I will be emailing her again ;) As for work last week, it was mighty busy for being a short week. My boss was off Wednesday and Thursday and problems seemed to suddenly appear in his absence. It may very well have been two perfectly normal days for him but I certainly had my hands full. This past weekend was busy but very good. I went out to see BBFM again and helped a friend get very drunk :) I was hoping for at least two more guests Saturday night besides my friend but one didn't feel well and another just didn't want to. Okay... its been a while since I went on one of my rants so here it goes. I was at the grocery store on Friday and in front of me was a woman, her infant, and the woman's mother. The infant and the grandmother were sitting on a bench past the checkout line talking (i.e. yelling) at the woman. The mother was checking out but at least a third of what she was buying was half eaten already... which is pretty impressive since she had about 18 to 20 items. She even had something from the deli that she half-ate and then told the cashier it didn't taste right so she didn't buy it. While she is checking out, the grandmother is basically yelling at her to come over and deal with the infant... who is making no noise and is being perfectly good. The cashier gets done checking her out, give her her change, bags her groceries (kindly keeping the half empty bottle of water out of the bag for her even), says "have a nice day" and starts ringing me up. At this point the grandmother yells "get double bags" so the woman starts to double bag her stuff. Apparently the grandmother thought the cashier should have stopped helping me and assisted the woman in double bagging her 3 bags because she stands up and yells "we need some help over here!!" Okay, the half-eaten groceries thing is a new pet-peeve of mine... I've never really seen it happen before so it never bothered me until now... but the screaming grandmother bothered me a lot more. Okay, now for a bonus rant. This one kind of evolved out of a conversation or three I've had recently having to do with adults and their underage partners. If you meet someone in a "21+ only" bar and end up having sex with them only to find out they are in fact underage then I feel that you have very little responsibility in the matter and should not get into any legal trouble. Its gotten so bad in this country that someone can show you ID that says they're 23 when in fact they are 16 and you're still the one at fault if anything happens. Okay, done with that rant. Oh, and in case you're wondering... no, I have not had sex with anyone underage... that rant was born from the last two episodes of ER and this past weekend's kidnapping of the 14 year old girl in PA.

11/16/05 - 10:03 pm Oh no, another update... how will you keep up ;) Okay, first off, I had a good but slightly worrisome night last night. I went out with a friend for a few hours and she broke some possibly bad news to me. Not much that I could say that her boyfriend didn't already tell her so we spent most of the time playing trivia. Tomorrow is the day things come to a head for her so I'm hoping to hear some news by tomorrow evening. As for today... it was very very interesting. The next month could see some changes at work including new people, promotions, resignations and a general shake up of things. I haven't heard any definites or anything but there are signs that things are going to change. In pretty much any way it happens, it looks anywhere from good to neutral for me. Other stuff... a plan to go to Deep Creek for a weekend is in the works :)

11/27/05 - 11:33 pm It was an eventful but pretty good T-day week for me. I had T-day dinner last Sunday since I was going to be out of town on Thursday and things went fairly well. The work week was a short one but did have a rather disappointing moment when my boss decided to check up on me when I emailed him and Asshat that I would be stopping by another building on my way in. My boss didn't believe me I guess and called the person I was going to see. I had actually been on the phone with a customer since before 9am (they called me) and got off the phone long enough to call my friend and tell him that I'd be stopping by... which was about 30 seconds after my boss called him. I'm not a real big fan of people not trusting me, especially when I have given them no reason not to. I haven't confronted anyone about it, no need to, I didn't do anything wrong, and if it comes back to bite me then people will be surprised. As for the real T-day, it was a good one for me but not for a friend of mine. I had tickets to the WVU game and I took a friend over with me... mostly to see her dad for T-day but also to go to the game with me. Her dad had been bugging her to come over so she said yes and gave him an approximate time when she'd be there. Well, weather in western Maryland wasn't the greatest so we were running a little behind but my friend did call when we were about 30 to 40 minutes away to let everyone know that she was close. I got her there around 4pm and then I left to check in to the hotel. I called her at 6:30pm to let her know I was on my way to pick her up and to make sure they made it through dinner... well... they did... too bad they made it through dinner before we ever got there. Folks... I complain about my family all the time but I know they are relatively normal... my friend's family is fucked up something fierce. I have one other friend that has a family that might compare but I'll have to check. To eat T-day dinner without your daughter knowing full well that you asked her to come, AND that she was only 40 minutes away, AND that you just spoke with her and didn't mention a damn thing... well... welcome to the Fucked-up Family Hall of Fame. The silver lining to this cloud is that I managed to get my friend nice and drunk, get her cheered up, and get the both of us the the football game :) The rest of that trip was pretty good too. I did get a phone call from another friend today telling me that my trip to Deep Creek was off for the time being. I don't have too many details but one of the key people going had a family member in a serious car accident this week :( Okay... time for bed.

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